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You might not realize it, but something besides yourself is running the show – often without your permission. And if you don’t understand it, it can mess with your success.
Your subconscious mind works behind the scenes and shapes your thoughts, habits, and reactions. It’s powerful, and it’s sneaky.
But I’m about to pull back the curtain to show what’s really going on inside that head of yours.
You’re about to learn:
Ready to take charge? Let’s get into it.
Ever driven somewhere and then realized you don't remember the trip?
That’s your subconscious on autopilot. It takes over and lets you zone out, while it handles all the details without bothering your conscious mind.
You can imagine your subconscious mind as an iceberg.
The small part above the water is your conscious mind – the thoughts and decisions you're aware of. But below the surface lies the massive, unseen bulk – that’s your subconscious.
But it’s more practical to think of your subconscious as your silent business partner.
Sometimes, it's super helpful and steers you in the right direction. Other times, it messes things up and leaves you to deal with the fallout.
Either way, it works behind the scenes, 24/7.
It controls your habits, fears, and reactions. It stores all your past experiences – even the ones you don’t consciously remember.
Pretty wild, right?
Here’s how it works:
You touch a hot stove as a kid. Your conscious mind thinks, “Ouch, that hurt!” But your subconscious mind goes to work and files away the experience. The next time you’re near a stove, it sends a quick warning – “Don’t touch that!”
This can be great for survival.
But what if your subconscious is filled with outdated, negative, or just plain wrong beliefs?
Then it can lead to subconscious behaviors like:
These actions are driven by your subconscious mind, not your conscious choices. It’s acting on autopilot, trying to protect you based on past experiences.
Now, you might not think flinching or biting your nails are serious issues.
But if you want to start and run a successful business…
Your subconscious mind is powerful, but it’s not perfect. It needs guidance and occasional updates to serve you better. In short, it can work for you – or against you.
On the bright side:
Then there’s the dark side:
Letting subconscious habits drive your life is a dangerous game. You might think you’re in control, but often, you’re not. That can sabotage your success without you even noticing.
Some examples include when you:
For example, let’s say you hesitated to launch a new product because you feared it wouldn’t sell. That’s your subconscious playing tricks.
The market might be ready, but your outdated belief holds you back.
So, how do you make sure you don’t fall into that trap?
Well…
There’s no shortage of gurus dishing out advice on how to hack your mind. And while some of the advice will work for some people, I’ve found much of it to be useless.
Let’s look at the most common examples.
You’ve probably heard that positive affirmations are the key to success. “Just tell yourself you’re amazing, and everything will fall into place,” they say.
Sounds simple, right?
But the truth is that positive affirmations can mess you up, especially if you’re struggling with anxiety or depression.
Here’s why:
Positive affirmations are supposed to work by getting you to focus on your strengths. They’re meant to shift your mindset from “I can’t” to “I can.”
But what if you don’t really believe what you’re saying?
What if, deep down, those words feel like lies?
If you’re already feeling low, repeating phrases like “I am worthy of success” can actually backfire. Instead of lifting you up, they can make you feel even worse.
Why?
Because your brain knows when something doesn’t match your reality. When you say “I am confident” but feel insecure, your mind starts arguing with itself.
This internal conflict creates stress and tension. And if you’re prone to anxiety or depression, it can trigger a self-defeating spiral.
You might’ve heard that hypnosis is a magical tool that can rewire your brain. But if you’re a natural skeptic like me, it’s not going to do a thing for you.
That’s because hypnosis doesn’t work unless you believe in it – it’s pure placebo.
Let me give you an example:
I was at a hypnosis seminar, and the instructor was guiding everyone through the process. He told the group to relax their eyes so much that they couldn’t open them, no matter how hard they tried.
Most people followed along, but one guy didn’t. His eyes popped right open.
Why? Because he didn’t buy into it. He wasn’t convinced, so it didn’t work.
Here’s the thing:
Your mind is powerful.
If you’re not on board with the idea of hypnosis, your brain will resist. It’s like a mental barrier that says, “You can’t make me!”
That’s especially true if you associate hypnosis with something negative, like weakness or loss of control.
And it’s not just hypnosis. The same goes for subliminal audio. Those recordings that claim to change your life while you sleep. They won’t work unless you already believe they will.
Surrounding yourself with positivity sounds great, right? But you’re just creating an echo chamber. And when you only allow positive voices, you shut out critical thinking.
Think about it — critically:
If everyone around you is constantly telling you how great you are, where’s the room for growth? You need to hear the hard truths, not just the fluffy affirmations.
This isn’t just me musing.
Look at kids who are showered with participation trophies and praised for just showing up.
Do they become confident winners? No.
This “positive environment” just produces losers.
George Carlin nailed it when he said, “There are no losers anymore. Everybody wins. Everybody gets a trophy.”
But what happens when these kids grow up? They step into the real world and hear something new: “You lost, Bobby. You’re a loser.”
Imagine that moment.
You’ve been told you’re a winner your whole life, but suddenly, reality hits. Your boss won’t give you a trophy for just showing up. They’ll tell you to clean out your desk if you don’t perform.
This false positivity doesn’t prepare you for the real challenges of life.
It sets you up for failure.
Positive visualization is just wishful thinking. It’s daydreaming about your ideal life instead of actually working toward it.
Sure, it feels good to imagine yourself living that dream. You picture the perfect business, the freedom, the success.
But here’s the problem:
Visualization without action is a trap. It tricks you into feeling like you’ve accomplished something when you haven’t done anything.
You might tell yourself that visualizing success will attract it to you. But the truth is that no amount of mental imagery will replace hard work.
Studies have shown that sharing your goals gives you a quick dopamine hit but also leads to complacency. You start to believe success is inevitable just because you’ve imagined it.
That’s dangerous thinking.
You need to be grounded in reality.
Your business won’t grow just because you spend a few minutes each morning imagining that it will. It grows because you make smart decisions, and put in the work every single day.
Consider this:
While you’re sitting there daydreaming, someone else is out there grinding. They’re making calls, closing deals, and pushing their business forward.
Soft, euphemistic language is just a way to avoid the truth. It doesn’t change reality—it just hides it. And hiding the truth is always a dangerous game.
Let’s pull out George Carlin again:
“Poor people used to live in slums. Now 'the economically disadvantaged' occupy 'substandard housing' in the 'inner cities.'
And they’re broke! They don't have a ‘negative cash flow position.’
They're broke because a lot of them were fired. Management wanted to ‘curtail redundancies in the human resources area’ so many people are no longer ‘viable members of the workforce.’”
The point is clear:
When you dress up the truth with nice words, you’re not helping anyone.
Euphemisms spare us discomfort but at the cost of clarity. If you’re struggling with a failing product, don’t call it a “market misalignment.”
Call it what it is – a flop.
Drop the soft language. Get real with yourself and your business. It’s the only way you’ll make real progress.
Good question; glad you asked. And since I’ve torn down five of the most common pieces of advice you’ll find, it’s only fair I equipped you with five of my go-to methods.
They’re not as glamorous but also don’t require you to believe in any woo-woo.
We all have moments of self-doubt. That just makes us human. And it’s in those moments you should remind yourself of your past wins.
David Goggins calls it the Cookie Jar method:
The Cookie Jar is a mental collection of your toughest wins – times when you pushed through pain and suffering and emerged victorious.
When doubt creeps in, reach into that jar, pull out a memory, and remind yourself of what you’re capable of.
But what if you don’t have enough (or any) past wins?
Then you have to go out there and get them.
As James Clear puts it in his book:
“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity.”
In other words, small actions, repeated consistently, build undeniable proof of who you are. This is the harsh truth about building confidence – you have to work for it.
Alex Hormozi sums it up beautifully:
“Confidence without evidence is a delusion. You don’t become confident by shouting affirmations in the mirror, but by having a stack of undeniable proof that you are who you say you are. Give yourself so much goddamn proof that you are the version of yourself you want to be, and you’ll become them. Outwork your self-doubt.”
Put in the work, day after day, until the evidence of your success is undeniable.
It’s not about wishing or hoping. It’s about proving.
You must build that stack of undeniable proof to fill up your cookie jar until your self-doubt doesn’t stand a chance.
Focusing on big goals can easily make you feel inadequate.
The bigger the goal, the more overwhelming it seems. It’s easy to get lost in the sheer size of what you want to achieve and end up feeling like you’re constantly falling short.
But here’s the thing:
The magic doesn’t happen in the goal itself – it happens in the process.
Break down your massive goals into small, manageable steps. Completing each of those small steps gives you the same dopamine boost as hitting a big milestone.
Again, James Clear explains this perfectly:
“Achieving a goal only changes your life for the moment. That’s the counterintuitive thing about improvement. We think we need to change our results, but the results are not the problem. What we really need to change are the systems that cause those results.”
So, let’s say your goal is to build a million-dollar business.
That’s huge, right?
But if you obsess over that number, you’ll likely feel like you’re never making progress. Instead, focus on the systems that will get you there: the daily tasks, the habits, the consistent actions.
These are what will actually move the needle.
Think of it this way:
If you love the process, the results will follow. You’re not chasing a finish line; you’re committing to a cycle of continuous improvement.
And that’s where real, long-term success comes from.
Life isn’t always rainbows and sunshine. Sometimes, things go wrong – really wrong.
But you can prepare for it.
Instead of pretending everything will be perfect, try using negative visualization to imagine the worst-case scenario.
Why? Because it helps you practice indifference to the chaos life can throw at you.
I’m not telling you to be a pessimist – just to be a realist.
The Stoics, some of the wisest thinkers in history, mastered this technique.
They would vividly picture their worst fears coming true. Not to scare themselves, but to prepare. By imagining the worst, they made it less terrifying.
When you do this, you realize that most of your fears are just that – fears.
Think of it as mental training.
When the worst actually happens, you won’t be caught off guard. You’ll be ready, calm, and in control. You’ll find that your worst fears often aren’t as bad as you imagined. And even if they are, you’ve already faced them in your mind.
Negative visualization is your shield against anxiety. It’s your tool to face whatever life throws your way without losing your cool.
You’ve probably experienced your mind constantly racing. You’re thinking about that missed opportunity from last week or stressing over tomorrow’s big pitch.
But here’s the truth:
Living in the past or future robs you of the present – which is all you truly have.
So, you have to train your mind to focus on the present moment.
This simple practice can reduce regret for the past and ease worry about the future. But most people don’t do it because they’re too busy being trapped in their thoughts.
Eckhart Tolle explains it well in The Power of Now:
“All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.”
When you’re stuck in your head, you’re not fully alive. You’re either reliving what’s already gone or worrying about what’s yet to come.
When you train your mind to stay present, you regain control. You see things clearly, make better decisions, and experience life fully.
Maybe you’re already keeping a journal – if not, I suggest you start one immediately. It’s a great way to collect your thoughts and track your progress.
But I’ve recently come up with a radical approach to journaling.
Start by keeping a rage journal.
This is where you let loose. Write down all your unfiltered negative thoughts – every frustration, every anger, every moment that makes you want to scream.
Don’t hold back. This is your space to get it all out without judgment.
Why?
Bottling up those emotions doesn’t make them disappear. It just lets them fester. By putting them on paper, you release that pent-up energy and understand what’s really bothering you.
Now, add a gratitude journal.
Here, you do the opposite. Detail everything positive you enjoy in life, no matter how small. Shift your focus to what’s going right.
Gratitude has been shown to boost your mood and increase overall happiness. Writing down what you’re thankful for helps you appreciate the good things and keeps you grounded.
Finally, compare the two journals.
You’ll often find that the negative thoughts in your rage journal are just fiction, blown out of proportion by stress or fear. The gratitude journal, on the other hand, reflects the reality of what’s good in your life.
This comparison gives you an accurate picture of your world.
Your subconscious mind is either your best friend or your worst enemy. It’s time to take control and stop letting it run the show. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.
Here’s what you need to remember:
You’ve got the tools. Now, it’s up to you to use them.
Take charge of your mind. Don’t let it take charge of you.
Scott
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