It’s about to hit 12 pm where I’ve chosen to have a really productive yet reset day for myself. When I mean reset day, I don’t just mean treating myself to a hot bath, doing the human cleaning stuff, buying healthy snacks and running all the errands that I have been meant to do. I also mean a mind reset.
Passing the half way mark in a coding bootcamp makes one realise how far they have come, not just in their technical skills but also the growth in their mindset. Yes, I’m about to share with you my half way mark/thoughts I have gathered whilst being in this crazy environment to learn code. If you’re not interested in this or you are expecting a lot of code lessons, it isn’ t the case. This is my warning for you now.
Firstly, it’s great to feel this feeling of abundance.“Wow, look how far I’ve come.” It’s point where we have this moment to stand back and it’s a strange rejuvenating moment because it’s not like the movies, where we win an oscar for it. I realised this moment just after I walked about from the Makers building, standing still for five seconds whilst I was blocking the door. It froze me that quickly and that much because it’s realising we have changed. In short, I wish for all of us to experience this because it’s really
A glimmer of a blessing to realise these things now than later, or in fact, never.
We’re all growing superstars at the end of the day.
Secondly, as I gather all my thoughts. This is almost like a “what would I tell myself when I start the course” but also for me, to say to myself:
The thoughts that you had of yourself and what you think are in the past. You have no obligation or benefit to think past thoughts as your goal and the only way you can go is forward.
We’re still can be fun, silly and creative adults but we’re just wiser about ourselves, our actions and what we can do. At the end of the day, these are the only things we can control .
Thirdly, a coding bootcamp or any bootcamp for a matter where you are isolated in a building with a group of people to learn as much as you can, is an experience I recommend.
You definitely learn more about yourself in a short period of time than you ever will learn in the time you were at university. I’ve probably grown up way quicker in the past three months than I did, in four years of being at university. It’s interesting for me as I find being at this bootcamp after graduation is almost a “trial round” of what the working-life could be.
Yes, today is the day I also reset my mind on all the emotions I’ve felt that have dragged my energy down. Apologies that this post goes too far of “being too much about me” but I think many who are in my boat, can relate.
I don’t know whether this is how every bootcamp is but at Makers Academy the environment they create, is a unique one (as I’ve mentioned)
It cements you in situations where you and only you are responsible for your own learning, for your own growth and to know what you need to take care of yourself or get back on your feet. Plus, you are handling the influence of the culture-shock Makers Academy is offering you on top of all these personalities, friends or co-workers, (guys) that you are being exposed to.
It’s definitely a roller-coaster that you’ve decided to get on (like most of us, without realising) and now can’t get off. Like any rollercoaster, you just have to accept what emotions or events may come your way and you’d be surprise that some of them can shake the very core of who you are.
There will be days where you can feel high on the fly or the most isolated, hated person on the planet. Though, the isolation is part of the process because this spotlight that exists, it’s gonna keep shining on you for the duration of the course. You are going to see things about yourself that you never saw and realise things about yourself you never did.
This could be your learning ability, the solutions to make you get over things, the things that give you energy, the things that drag your energy down, the traumas that affect your insecurities and behaviours, the thoughts that are blocking you from being the person you want to be… I can go on with the life lesson lingos but I’ll stop here.
Whether that shocks you to the degree of you needing time to process it, my advice is just to reflect about it like I am now.
Note: It’s really beneficial that Makers Academy has Dana (shoutout to Dana) as she is the joy officer that checks on our wellbeing. Imagine if we couldn’t talk to someone about all these emotions and events that occur, I’d imagine we’ll all be looney by the time this course ends.
The first four weeks, I suffered greatly on some parts (Databases and several others) ramming my head against the wall of what I was doing wrong and why my code was not giving the result it expected. I for sure wasn’t the only one, many others were suffering as well.
Logically, when you are not in the code bubble with your pair, you would think “Hey, if I don’t know how to do something, I will follow the instructions to show me how to do it.” However, that idea flies out the window for some reason. People deal with the case where you have either jumped ahead thinking that they know where this is going (you never do realise this until you’ve jumped ahead) without realising they have misunderstood the instructions that have been written.
Then, we get stuck in the situation of countlessly researching for some glimmer of an answer without realising that there could be a 50% chance that we are digging ourselves in a hole, deeper and deeper by the minute. At this point, we all think that digging is better than not digging at all because we think this is productive rather than taking a step back thinking what was the whole point of this instruction to begin with….
Although there is an option to sue the bootcamp on their instructions, most of the time stuff doesn’t work is because of us and our interpretation of those instructions. I always thought in the working world, that adults were trained to follow instructions and do the set of tasks that were asked of them.
Plus, in a coding bootcamp, if you or your pair partner are not clear with instructions, ask the people who wrote them (i.e the coaches).
It never hurts in a place of learning and I’m guessing in a place of industry to want to be sure of what is being asked. It’s better to be clear with what’s going on than do something, come back, and realise you’ve done it wrong this whole time. At the end of day, this will waste your time and if your working, the person who asked you to do that task.
If you know an answer to a question, say it. If you have a suggestion to solve a problem, say it. If you need guidance or help, ask for it. Never apologize for this and never say you are stupid for doing so.
It took me six weeks to get over my unnecessary apologies and stupidity when I with the coaches and some of my pair partners. Part of the reason we feel stupid is because they have experience in code and we are experiencing the “you should know this by now” syndrome. However, these people were probably in your shoes once where they didn’t know stuff and they had to learn. You are just their past selves.
The way I see the Makers coaches now.
It’s funny how I now think most of the coaches are Makers are actually quite homey, and the guy coaches are kinda “bear-like.” It’s almost like they’re intention was to give a caring aura (they are doing a job of it) where they are welcoming you to their home anytime you are struggling or stressed.
In fact, you are probably braver and smarter for doing so compared to the other people who aren’t daring to do so. You aren not only helping yourself grow by getting use to being wrong and speaking out, but helping you to learn by being confident to ask. In addition, to people in the industry, this shows you have a keen passion and to learn about it.
We’ve all been there and said it. “Assuming that this works, this is the problem” or we have assumed an object is giving us the data or result we want. Assumptions will never help you move forward when solving a problem. It’s always good to be sure what every piece of your code is doing before asking for help, because most of the time we ask for help, we realise our assumption on what our code is giving is wrong.
Although it’s good as a developer to predict what our code is giving us, it’s even better if we TEST WHAT OUR CODE DOES and KNOW WHAT IT’S GIVING US. Whether it is console.logging everything or debugging every single line of code, it’s better to know than not know.
Assumptions are what clouds our judgement. In my three month experience of being intimidated by people, figuring out code and in life in general, it diverts our thoughts to thinking about things to a grander scale than they actually are.
Whether it is a classroom, an office environment or an environment where a group of people see each other every three months, everyone will not be your best friend or love you for who you are. No matter how much you try or how much effort you put in, the dream of wanting to be close to everyone like a family is something you cannot force. If it happens, great it happens and yes we can aim for that…but some people just don’t click with you, or aren’t on the same page or that your and their vibe is just awkward.
Now, it’s not that these people are evil or hate you, although we often think it’s the case. It’s just that they are juggling other people with their effort and can’t afford to juggle their effort for you. Getting to know someone is hard work. It’s tiering, it takes patience and you can’t be expecting anything from them. Hell, socialising is hard especially when you are in a bootcamp where everyone came here for on their own careers and path. That gives less time for people to put the amount of effort into people, right?
So, the next time you are thinking you’ve put in effort to someone you thought you were close to and realise that they haven’t put the effort into you, and suddenly think that they hate you, take a chill pill.
Everyone came to this bootcamp for themselves at the end of the day. They are juggling a ton of stuff, whether it be learning the code in the course, going to events to network, writing up their cvs, doing weekend projects, doing week projects, balancing their health, maintaining their sanity….just like you are and they simply might not have the time or be comfortable enough to take their time-offs with you.
As much as socialising is difficult, the unfortunate thing that a large part of getting into an industry or succeeding in an industry, is networking. I know I dread this because I find socialising for fun an effort.
Don’t worry you are not the only one.
Although you might not be bffs with everyone, the best thing you can do in a working environment is to professionally be a great person to work with. Overlooked stuff such as being on time, communicating, asking out of interest or to be sure, commitment to the team, keeping a team together, supporting if everyone’s okay, taking on things that you might not be comfortable with or that is extra from your skill set…I can go on.
All of these habits, are going to make you a great person to work with and everyone can’t hate this person for simply being a respectful contributing human being unless they are insecure about their work qualities.
It shows your passion, determination, heart and grit for what you are doing and isn’t that what every industry is looking for? Someone who is passionate and committed to their work? This should be something we all aim for because the more people who think of us this way, the more confident we become to show ourselves in this way and the more industry will recognise us, and with hope it’ll shine a light to how we will be a good asset to the company.
At the end of the day, you have probably taken a coding bootcamp to enhance your skills and get a job as a developer. I’m not saying that this is your “story” but there’s a high chance that it is. Getting a job requires you to put yourself out there or as they say “sell yourself.” Thus, it’s then important for us to know what useful qualities we can bring to the table and what are our limits to respect ourselves, as a brand, and also as a human being.
Although we are still discovering ourselves, should be aware but not 100% care about what other people are selling or what brands are looking for whilst shifting through thousands of applications, it’s more about what you can offer for now that is unique and that would appeal as a great story to hear and carry onward.
Everyone has a place they come from, experiences they’ve been through, dreams to conquer and thus, a story to share. The question I will to pose to you is then to ask yourself: what is your story and if you have one, are you expressing your story or your brand is the words you write on your CV?
Discovering your brand is a good way to know yourself, to find what types of companies you think will suit you and also a good way for you to know how you can flip your useless qualities or flaws to flourishing gifts everyone would want to have. A brand today after all requires talent, skill, personality and individuality.
Being in a coding bootcamp where a large part of it is stressful and a pool of men, there comes a lot of situations where things can be taken too far or that you’ll slip up. In those moments, you have a choice of either stressing out intensely, kicking the table like a 3 year old, melting a pool of your own despair, reporting a transgression made by one of your guy co-workers for making a hurtful joke or laughing about it.
It can seem psychotic at first when you think about it, but if you can laugh at anything, a lot of things can’t phase you. It’s almost as if all the negative feelings will pass quicker and gives you the energy to overcome the situation. Note: There’s a difference to telling yourself this and actually doing this, and I’ve finally been able to do it. Thanks guys.
I can say being halfway, I know I’ve failed in coding projects and made mistakes whilst working with people, knowing that I could have done something better, or acted better. Making mistakes and failing is okay, it’s human. What’s important is we learn from them, whether it’s the easy way or hard way. It’s how we improve, grow and know not to make that same mistakes again.
However, I don’t think this idea of “it’s okay to fail or make mistakes” is cemented in the ‘working world’, let alone in many people’s minds. That’s understandable at first right because making mistakes or failing can feel so overwhelming and hurt a company really badly to the point of going out of business or even traumatize a person. It’s full of despair, hurt, regret, anger, revenge, disappointment, guilt, self-inflicting harm and just, tears and tears of hard work or trust gone.
I’m not saying I don’t feel those feelings when I fail or make mistakes, I do. However, is it the end of world?Well, I’m still alive, I still have my limbs, I still have my senses, I still have my sanity, I have my family, I have my friends , I still have a chance of doing something to contribute. Most normal cases and we forget that we have a chance to try again. Maybe not with the same company, person, place or in the time-frame we want, but there’s no limit to life to how many times we can give things a go.
In fact, I think as hurtful as it is, we should learn to forgive people who make mistakes, be fine with humans making mistakes, be fine with us making mistakes and overcoming our traumas. I’m not saying we should trust the people or experiences who’ve hurt us or not take the time to get over our mistakes, but it really isn’t the end of the world when you fail.
If you want to learn a new language, learn a new language. If you want to be a developer, work on being a developer. If you want to go to an event, go to an event. If you want to take dance classes, take dance classes. If you want to be friends with that person, approach that person. If you want a person as your mentor, ask. If you want that new screen, work and save for it. If you want a nice butt, start working on your butt. If you want to take a day off, take a day off. If you wanna write a book, write a book. If you want to shout in the middle of the park, shout in in the middle of the park.
If you want to eat cookies while taking a hot bath, freakin eat cookies whilst your in a hot bath.
A wish-list is good to start with to know your goals or things that you want to achieve but all it is, is a piece of paper with your dreams. If you want things, want to achieve things, go to them. Days are going to past by but your story isn’t going to go anywhere if you don’t live it.
You do have a chance!
You are the only person living this story, and you get one story to live (unless reincarnation of being the exact same person is proven to be true) . You are the only person who can control your actions, your reactions to situations, your decisions and where your story will entail to, everyday. Having a story can seem like an intimidating responsibility just like taking responsibility of our life, but we each have a chance to make it fulfilling and live the fulfilling adventures we will have.
If you are amongst people who you feel that don’t care about you, don’t let that change your positive energy of how you came into the room. Instead, exude that energy and if you are an over-caring person, a quote I will always remember by Makers is
~ “Screw them with love”