Recently, I revisited a scene from Disney's movie "Soul" that left me pondering deeply about life and happiness. The conversation between Dorothea and Joe is particularly striking:
(Joe comes out from his first music band show after several struggles)
Dorothea: What’s wrong, Joe?
Joe: It’s just... I’ve been waiting on this day for my entire life.
Joe: I thought I’d feel different...
Dorothea: I heard this story about a fish. He swims up to an older fish and says, ‘I’m trying to find this thing they call the ocean.’ ‘The ocean?’ says the older fish, ‘that’s what you’re in right now.’ ‘This?’ says the young fish, ‘this is water. What I want is the ocean!’
(They share a moment of understanding.)
Dorothea: See you tomorrow.
(The car drives away.)
This scene poignantly illustrates a significant fallacy in our pursuit of happiness. We often trap ourselves in the belief that joy is a destination – "I’ll be happy when..."
The biggest trick our mind plays on us lies in this perpetual chase for fulfillment. We relentlessly pursue our dreams, convinced that happiness awaits on the other side of these grand achievements. Yet, in this constant striving, we overlook the beauty of now – the small, ordinary, everyday moments that truly enrich our lives.
Take entrepreneurs, for example. Many aim for a unicorn status or a billion-dollar exit, only to find themselves unfulfilled in the present.
They miss the essence of their journey – the joy of building, creating and growing something from the ground up.
Example: Consider a writer working on a novel. If they focus solely on the goal of publishing and making money, they might miss the joy of creation, the excitement of developing characters, and the satisfaction of weaving a compelling narrative.
The key is to redefine our goals. Instead of saying, "I want to achieve X," we should frame it as "I want to enjoy every single second on the journey to achieving X." This mindset shift allows us to find joy in the process, not just in the end goal.
Example: A musician learning a new instrument might set a goal not just to publish an album or winning a Grammy award but to relish every practice session, enjoying the progress and the challenges.
So, let's pause and ask ourselves, "Am I really happy?" It's crucial to remember that happiness isn't a distant goal to be reached. It's right here, in the ocean we're swimming in – not in the elusive 'water' we keep searching for.
Are you really happy?
Also published here.