-𝙸𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚎.
-𝙳𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚗 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎.
Year 2048.
The first words I ever heard were in a facility for kids. We were five, the golden children of humankind. From the age of 2, we could fire darts with precision, and it wasn’t weird. We never had anyone new join us; we were always alone, together. Father called us geniuses; he called us creatures beyond humanity.
Father never hid the truth from us, and he treated us with utmost respect. We never saw Mother. Not even once. We only knew she existed because Father mentioned her from time to time. Father loved us, and he told us that we were his only hope. Father hid nothing from us; he believed in being straightforward.
“The world will one day see all you can do. Until then, forgive me.” Father said one day, as he stared pointedly at the five of us, me being some sort of leader, according to Father. Father was a large man with tribal marks of jagged lines adorning his face, giving him the look of a warrior, but the lab coat he always wore conflicted with his weathered face, making him look like a cross between a villain and a doting father.
We didn’t know what we had to forgive Father for; he was always there when we needed him, along with two others. Father called them his underlings, yet he was so friendly with them; the camaraderie was beautiful. We were treated well and didn’t have a cause to question our existence.
Names were not given to us, and we lived with codes. Father said names were outdated and called us in codes. I was 0i. Father said codes were vital because we were different from the rest of the people in the books we read. Father made us feed on Socrates, Plato, and so many other ancient philosophers. His favorite was Friedrich Nietzsche, who spoke about the abyss. Father spoon-fed us knowledge, saying we needed to understand how the world worked.
“You’re only useful when you choose to be. The power you wield lies in your willingness to wield it. Man is a creature of willpower, and once willpower is taken away, nothing remains of man. A fate worse than death.”
Father’s favorite quote was a personal one. He never ceased to remind us of what would happen if our willpower was taken away. Father was the only god we knew. We didn’t exactly worship him; we loved him. He was all we knew, the light in our overwhelming darkness. A man worthy of the title, father.
0ii, one of the girls in our midst. She was sharp-eyed, her mouth rarely opening up to speak. With an oval face and a perfect nose, 0ii became fascinating. I once asked Father why she wasn’t the leader since I didn’t think I was fit. Father was calm when he replied, but I could hear the underlying fury in his tone.
“0ii is none other than your subordinate. Your birth marks you as a leader, and your prowess doesn’t matter. She is below you; she always will be. You were born a light that even others cannot but bow to. You are the one who will herald humanity into the new age. You are 0i. Do not forget.”
I never brought it up again after that. We knew that Father loved us and Father’s word was law. So, we let go of sentimental things and focused on being the best, making Father proud. Oiii was next. Another girl. She wasn’t as charming or as beautiful as 0ii, but what she lacked in those aspects, she made up for it in smartness. She had hooked teeth and self-esteem that caved with the slightest criticism. Father called her a fond name: 𝐵𝑎𝑏𝑦 𝑅𝑎𝑏𝑏𝑖𝑡. She was the only one who had a name in five of us.
When I asked him why, Father laughed heartily and spoke to me in the most jovial tone ever.
“What is she? Isn’t that what she looks like? I’m only calling her as I see it.”
Father was wise beyond his years; I admired him so much. We all did. He knew so much about everything, much more than we did. 0iv was the bookworm in our midst. He consumed all the books in the library, but still, Father paid him no heed. With his glasses perked on the bridge of his nose, 0iv did everything to get Father’s attention, but it was to no avail. I asked Father about it once again.
“Those who seek attention are like dogs begging for scraps. They’re unworthy of it. That’s why they demand it from others.”
I was the only one whom Father talked to so openly, so I spoke for us. We were the golden children humanity had been waiting for; Father said so. But when we were 9, Father introduced the blades. They were beautiful blades with edges sharp enough to sear through a human.
“These are the gifts I’ll be giving all of you for your 9th birthday. Use them well.”
Father didn’t explain anything to any of us, but I understood. We had read stories of assassins, and we understood what was required of us. Father was all-knowing, training us in the Art of the blade even though he was never there to see. It didn’t matter; 0v excelled at it beautifully. He was the only one out of us. Father never said anything bad about him. Truthfully, Father never said anything about him at all. It was as though he didn’t exist. 0v never complained, either. He was even more beautiful than 0ii, yet his gaze was even chillier than Father’s.
The day 0iii died, Father didn’t bat an eyelid. 0v was playing with two sets of blades, and 0iii dared to approach him in that mode. I always knew he was darker than he let on, but watching 0iii grip her bloodied neck, eyes widened in disbelief as she dropped to the floor in a thud made me finally understand. Father was passing by when it happened, but he didn’t spare her a glance. The rest of us were shocked by what we’d seen, but 0v kept twirling the blades in the air, a bored expression on his beautiful face.
“Father! 0iii is dead!” I screamed for the first time at Father. But Father didn’t look as though he was bothered. He walked away. Father didn’t look back for the first time.
Once we were five, then we became four.
Father stopped talking to me after that. 0v acted normally, while 0ii and 0iv steered clear of him. 0v offered no explanations for his actions, and one day, Father stopped coming to see us. He usually went away for days, leaving his underlings with us sometimes. But this time, Father left us alone. I counted the days. I was the leader, and I had to tell the others what to do. It wasn’t exactly a good experience. But strangely, 0v didn’t show any sign of distress. It was as though he didn’t have emotions.
“You must do your share of the work, or we’ll starve.”
I decided to face him one day, already livid. 0iii was dead, and he couldn’t even act remorseful. He didn’t care, plain and simple. He grew up with us yet grew apart from us. It was like he was in his universe, unperturbed by everything around him. He was human yet acted so differently, I wondered, too.
“Starve? Okay, starve.”
That was all he said as he stood up from where he sat, his hair shielding his eyes. His hair had been an afro since I’d known him, adding to the mystery his personality created. I was tired of being scared of a person who was just like me. It was irksome and unnecessary. We weren’t made of fear.
I placed my arms on his shoulders to pull him back, but the next thing I saw was a dagger heading straight in the middle of my face. It was too fast for me to dodge, and I saw my life flash before my eyes. His wrist movements were perfect, with no single flaw in the swing of his blade. It was funny how I was thinking about that while facing my inevitable death. As soon as it began, it ended. I was alive. But I could hear gurgling sounds as my eyes I once closed opened to see someone in front of me. It was 0iv, and the hilt of a dagger was protruding from his mouth.
“I said, starve.”
0v drew his dagger out of the open mouth of 0iv as 0iv fell to the ground, much like 0iii did. The dagger reached the back of his throat as 0v drew it out, placing his tongue on the flat of the dagger, licking the blood on it while staring at me with the coldest eyes I’d ever seen. I tried to stop my body from shaking, but it was hard. 0iv did what he did to shield me, and he lay there, choking on his blood. 0v just walked away as 0ii ran to the toilet to puke. I just stood and stared. Hell had been unleashed in the form of a beautiful boy.
Once we were five, then we became three.
Father returned a week after that incident, and he said nothing about the disappearance of 0iv. I didn’t explain either. I needed to find a way out of there with 0ii. Father tried to talk to me again, but it was no use. 0v was a demon, one he let roam. Father wasn’t to be trusted. I spoke hushedly with 0ii, not letting 0v into our conversation. But he didn’t mind, and it was as though he wasn’t even there. He kept fiddling with daggers, paying us no heed.
That night was meant to be the night of our escape. I prepared 0ii, and in the dead of the night, we tried to sneak out. I regretted it. It was all fine and good, and we were making progress. Since everybody was asleep, we moved stealthily. 0iii would have loved it; she was the smartest of us. I still had no idea why 0iv protected me; he was book-smart. He knew the implications of playing the hero. Yet, he died for me.
If I had one thing to say, I wish I’d died with them.
0ii needed to be protected at all costs. We made it past the door of Father, and at that moment, I was elated. We could finally leave. Until the lights came on. They were blinding, and I held on to 0ii, fearing the worst.
“Finally, let the game begin.”
I heard the voice of Father as he smiled sinisterly at me, 0v coming from right behind him, holding a dagger and staring at me with lifeless eyes. Then, hell began. Protecting 0ii was hard, and shielding myself from stab wounds was harder. I could hear booming sounds from the speakers that miraculously materialized around me. They were making bets on us.
0v came after me, swinging the dagger dangerously close to my face, but I evaded. Then he went after 0ii, but she showed some skill by dodging his attacks. Even in the cramped space of the facility, we fought for our lives. I saw Father approaching me, and 0v stopped swinging his dagger and stood still.
“Father…” I tried to reach him, but he slapped my hands away. It felt even worse than losing 0iii and 0v.
“Don’t you dare call me that. I’m not your father, and I’ll never be the father of freaks. Here, we harvest your abilities and sell them to the world. You’re not special; you’ve never been. You never had a father, just a childish imagination and daddy issues.”
I couldn’t speak. I didn’t know what happened, but I could hear ringing in my ears and a voice screaming at me from afar; it was muffled as though it was coming from a distance. The ringing sound in my ears got louder as 0ii screams came out in muffled gasps, but I was too far away to hear. Far away in my head. I could listen to the sound of a blade rending through flesh; I could smell the sickening odor of blood. But, I was rooted at that spot. Nothing could make me move as I stared with despair at the man I called Father.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, 0i. You always were the best of us. I was too weak; I believed them.”
0v eyes were filled with tears as he turned the blood-stained dagger on himself. Even then, I didn’t react. Even when his screams filled the room, and the ringing in my ears faded like background noise.
Once we were five, then we became one.
I was left alive. Not like I could die. They didn’t kill me; they just made me live every day in remembrance of those I killed. We weren’t the golden children of humanity, we were livestock.
Not all is as it seems. But hell is on earth. When I called him Father, I unleashed it.
I didn’t die. I didn’t live either. I was in oblivion. It was truly damnation.