What To Do When Your Code Breaks

A definitive guide to relieving the stress of programming.

1. Highlight the portion of the red error-message that appears to be in legible English.
2. Copy and paste the error directly into Google search.
3. Ctrl-Click the first 6–10 entries from stackoverflow to saturate your browser with enough tabs to obfuscate which is which.
4. Brew a shot of espresso directly into the half-full cup of coffee you brewed 20 minutes ago.
5. Proceed to copy and paste the code from a potential solution into your program without reading any of the descriptions or context.
6. Run your code and repeat step 5 until the error messages finally shut up or you run out of tabs.
7. Read the latest blog posts about the iPhone X.
8. Switch from coffee to beer and reason that depressants make an ideal solution to neutralizing stimulants.
9. Open a new browser and direct it to Medium to document the process of relieving stress.