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Host of The Success Story Podcast. I write a newsletter to 321,000 people. newsletter.scottdclary.com
I've been "dying" every night.
Not physically, obviously. I'm sitting here typing this letter on a bright Thursday morning.
But mentally, I've been killing my old self every evening to create space for a new version of me to emerge each morning.
This isn't some weird spiritual practice or manifestation technique. It's a brutal mental model for making better decisions—one that has fundamentally changed how I approach my work, relationships, and creative projects.
The concept is simple:
When you go to sleep each night, your previous life is over. The person who wakes up the next morning is starting fresh.
This perspective shift sounds trivial but has profound implications. Let me show you how this works and why it might be exactly what you need right now.
Most people live as if they're legally bound to honor every commitment they made in the past.
You said you'd finish that project, so you keep grinding even though it's going nowhere.
You started that relationship, so you stay in it despite knowing it's not serving either of you.
You invested time learning a skill, so you keep pursuing it even though you've lost all interest.
We become hostages to our past decisions, dragging them forward day after day, justifying them with phrases like:
"I've already put so much into this..." "I can't quit now..." "What would people think if I just stopped?"
There's a psychological reason for this. The sunk cost fallacy keeps us investing in things that aren't working simply because we've already invested in them. Our ego doesn't want to admit we were wrong, so we double down instead of moving on.
But there's an even deeper issue at play.
Your identity becomes fused with your commitments.
You're not just someone working on a project. You become "the person who's building that app." You're not just exploring a career path.
You become "an aspiring designer." You're not just trying a business model. You become "a coach" or "a consultant" or "a creator."
And once your identity fuses with what you do, abandoning those things feels like abandoning yourself.
That's the trap.
Justin Welsh, one of the most successful solo entrepreneurs I know, shared a practice that perfectly captures this mental model:
"I tried something weird last month. Each morning, I'd think: 'My previous life is over. The new one starts now.'"
This simple shift is like pressing the reset button on your decision-making process every 24 hours.
It doesn't mean you abandon all responsibility or consistency. It means you stop making decisions based on what past-you decided and start making decisions based on what present-you actually wants and needs.
When you "die" each night, you wake up with:
All you have is today, and the freedom to decide what's actually worth your time, energy, and attention right now.
I've been experimenting with this concept for the past few weeks, and the results have been transformative.
The first thing that changed was my relationship to unfinished projects.
I had three major initiatives in progress, all of which I was pushing forward out of a sense of obligation to my past commitments. When I applied the "die every night" framework, I asked myself a simple question:
"If I were starting fresh today, would I choose to work on this?"
For two of the three projects, the answer was an immediate and obvious "no." They were ideas that excited past-me but didn't align with what present-me wanted to create.
So I dropped them. Completely. No guilt, no second-guessing.
The third project, I kept—not because I had already invested in it, but because it genuinely excited the person I was that day.
My daily writing practice changed too.
Instead of continuing threads and ideas from previous days, I started asking: "What does today's version of me actually want to write about?"
Sometimes that aligned with previous work. Often it didn't. The result has been more authentic, energized writing that actually resonates with people rather than content I produced to maintain consistency with my past self.
The most surprising effects of this mental model showed up in ways I didn't anticipate.
When you're not dragging the weight of past commitments, you have significantly more energy for what genuinely matters today.
Projects I chose to continue received more focused attention. Conversations became more present and engaged. Creative work flowed more naturally because it wasn't competing with the mental drain of obligations I was forcing myself to fulfill.
"Sorry, I can't make it. The person who agreed to that meeting died last night, and today's version of me has different priorities."
I haven't actually said those words to anyone (though I've been tempted), but the underlying mindset has completely transformed my relationship to other people's expectations.
When someone tries to hold me to a commitment that no longer serves either of us, I can evaluate it fresh, without feeling bound by what past-me promised.
Growth happens through iteration, not continuation.
When you're willing to "die" to your previous self each day, you create space for rapid evolution. You can try something, evaluate it honestly, and change course without the friction of identity protection.
In just weeks of practicing this approach, I've made shifts in my work that would have taken months or years under my old decision-making framework.
The obvious objection to this mental model is that it seems to undermine consistency, discipline, and long-term commitment—all values I've previously championed.
But there's a crucial distinction:
True consistency isn't about doing the same things. It's about serving the same core values with whatever actions make sense today.
Some commitments should absolutely persist day after day. The difference is in why they persist.
Under the "die every night" model, you don't keep a commitment because you made it yesterday. You keep it because you would choose to make it again today.
This applies to everything:
True consistency comes from repeatedly choosing what aligns with your core values, not from blindly following through on past decisions.
If you want to try this mental approach, here's how to begin:
Each night before bed, consciously release yourself from all commitments, identities, and expectations. Imagine that version of you—with all its decisions, promises, and attachments—is complete.
This isn't about abandoning responsibility. It's about creating psychological space for genuine choice.
When you wake up, before checking your phone or diving into your to-do list, ask yourself:
"If I were starting completely fresh today, what would I choose to do? Who would I choose to be? What would genuinely matter to me?"
Don't rush this process. Sit with it. The answers might surprise you.
For each major commitment on your plate, ask:
"Would I make this commitment today if I hadn't already made it yesterday?"
If the answer is yes, continue with renewed energy and clarity.
If the answer is no, consider how to responsibly transition away from it.
Notice when you're making decisions to protect an identity rather than to create value or joy.
"I have to finish this because I'm a person who finishes things." "I can't quit because I'm not a quitter." "I need to stay consistent because that's who I am."
These identity-protecting thoughts are usually signs you're serving your past self rather than your present truth.
The uncomfortable reality is that when you apply this framework rigorously, many of your current commitments won't survive the evaluation.
You'll realize you're doing things because:
And while it would be easier to continue on autopilot, that path leads to a life of diminishing returns—more effort for less meaningful output.
The alternative is to bravely "die" to what no longer serves you and direct your finite energy toward what genuinely matters today.
Three months ago, I had a content strategy that was working well. I was creating a mix of business advice, life optimization strategies, and personal development insights across multiple platforms.
It was generating followers, email subscribers, and podcast listens. By conventional metrics, it was successful.
But when I applied the "die every night" framework, I realized something crucial: I wouldn't choose that same strategy if I were starting fresh today.
The topics still interested me, but the format, frequency, and focus didn't align with what present-me wanted to create.
So I pivoted. Completely. I reduced my posting frequency, changed my content mix, and focused on deeper explorations of fewer topics.
Conventional wisdom would consider this a mistake. "Don't change what's working," the experts say. "Stay consistent," they advise.
But the results speak for themselves:
Why? Because when you create from authentic present-moment alignment rather than past momentum, people feel it. The energy is different. The impact is deeper.
And more importantly, the work itself becomes energizing rather than depleting.
This mental model extends far beyond your professional commitments.
Apply it to your relationships by asking: "If I met this person today, would I choose to build a relationship with them?"
Apply it to your lifestyle by asking: "If I were designing my life from scratch today, would I live where I live, structure my days as I do, and prioritize what I prioritize?"
Apply it to your beliefs by asking: "If I encountered this idea for the first time today, would I incorporate it into my worldview?"
The questions are confronting. The answers may be uncomfortable. But they create space for intentional choices rather than continued momentum.
If this approach resonates but feels too radical to fully implement, start with a single day.
Pick tomorrow. When you wake up, imagine you're starting completely fresh. Your slate is clean. Your obligations are gone. Your identities are fluid.
For just one day, make every decision from this place of freedom. Choose what to work on, who to engage with, and how to spend your time as if you had no prior commitments.
At the end of the day, reflect:
This one-day experiment will give you valuable data about where you're genuinely aligned with your current commitments and where you're operating on autopilot.
The "die every night" framework isn't about avoiding commitment. It's about making commitments consciously and repeatedly, rather than once and then blindly following through regardless of changing circumstances.
True freedom isn't having no commitments. It's choosing your commitments anew each day.
When you wake up tomorrow, remember: the person who made yesterday's commitments is gone. They did their best with what they knew.
Today, you get to choose again, with new information, new energy, and new priorities.
Choose wisely.
Thank you for reading.
– Scott