Why You Have to Love 1-to-1 Meetings to Succeed in Your Career

Management is about people and helping your team achieve company goals. Whether you’re stepping into a management role in a new company or trying to improve things in your current position, success often relies on using a variety of techniques. Through years of experience, I’ve realised that well-established communication with your colleagues is the cornerstone of a successful career and business. In this article, I’ll share my approach to team management, which focuses on regular one-to-one (121) meetings as an easy and powerful method for making things better.

One-to-one meetings are a highly popular approach in modern software development. Basically, it's a conversation between a manager and a team member. As a manager, you discuss the current status, ask “How are you?”, and help with motivation. But as far as I’ve seen, often these meetings are awkward, unstructured, and only happen when there is a problem with the project or the employee. My idea is that 121s should be the backbone of the company. They need to create a system where these meetings happen regularly and maintain themselves, rather than only being used reactively.

Let’s dive into a Patrick Lencioni-style story with a fictional company, because examples often illustrate problems and solutions better than simply describing the basics.

PaperGone on the Brink: From Mistakes to Solutions with Alex

Alex is a well-experienced engineering manager. He started his career in outsourcing, worked in big companies with dozens of teams, and also gained experience in mid-sized companies. However, he wanted more decision-making freedom and the opportunity to make a significant impact on the product. After passing several rounds of stressful interviews, he received an exciting offer from PaperGone.

PaperGone provides a unique shredding service on subscription. Through their web or mobile app, companies can regularly order a van equipped with a CIA-grade shredder that demolishes all drafts and leftovers of potentially confidential information. What’s more, the shredded paper is converted into ECO-friendly fertilizer. Companies even get a badge for their website showing how many trees or how much wheat was planted thanks to their efforts, while their lawyers conjure up tax deductions. Everyone’s happy.

PaperGone, which started as a small startup, now has about 40 employees in development, not to mention the sales, accounting, support, and shredder teams. Business was booming, but the software? Not so much. Last month, one of their biggest clients, a major food company, failed to pay their subscription due to a broken website and missed their scheduled shredder van. Half of their office was frozen because the company’s policy forbids working in a cluttered environment with unshredded documents. To make matters worse, all the secretaries quit, claiming that shredding documents wasn’t in their job descriptions, calling it humiliating. It was a PR nightmare. PaperGone received numerous complaints, and the previous head of engineering was fired. Now, Alex was stepping in to fix the software problems and restore the company's reputation.

Alex’s mission was clear: he needed to fix the product development process and rebuild team morale after the departure of the previous head of engineering. PaperGone’s development department was divided into four main divisions: Product, Backend and Web Development, Mobile Development, and QA. Each division had a loyal manager, though many were partially burned out from the chaos of recent events. In addition to leading these teams, Alex had to report to the C-level executives, who were responsible for generating product ideas and driving the company’s overall vision.

Naturally, Alex began by meeting with all the team members, gaining access to product documentation, time tracking systems, and the current product backlog. However, in this article, we won’t focus on how to start a new job and quickly get up to speed. Instead, we’ll explore the strategies Alex used to truly transform team dynamics and restore productivity. And how this led him to implement the 121 routine.

Aligning with Your Boss: The Power of Regular 121s

There are two primary goals - and several smaller ones - that 121 meetings can help you achieve:

1. To understand what you need to do and meet your boss's expectations.
2. To stay informed about what's happening within your team and communicate your expectations to your team members.

The first goal is crucial, perhaps the most important. Many employees tend to think that 121 meetings are something only the boss needs, not them. Everyone is busy, and it's easy to postpone or reschedule the meeting if nothing seems wrong and the team is motivated. Things seem to be on track, so why waste time? But that's exactly where the problem begins.

You need to show your boss that these meetings are important and deserve a fixed time in the schedule. Your boss must understand that it's part of their job to spend time with you. If your boss is uncomfortable with this, you can even propose an agenda yourself and treat these meetings as a form of report:

• Here are the current tasks and progress since our last meeting.
• Here are the plans for the next week.
• Here are the potential problems we might face.
• By the way, I'm doing fine. My wife and I are planning to go hiking this weekend.

These meetings become a critical source of information that helps you succeed as a manager and solve problems before they escalate. Now, let’s return to our story.

Alex spent his first month getting used to the company’s processes. He talked with key employees, checked the bug tracker, and learned how the PaperGone app and infrastructure worked. They even released a new version of the app with some fixes, but Alex was more of an observer than a game-changer in a team that already had established processes and traditions. He gained a clear understanding of the current status and plans, and realized how he could improve things. First, however, he had to deal with the CEO.

Catching Jane, the CEO of PaperGone, was no easy task. Her calendar was fully booked with endless calls with clients and other departments. Nonetheless, they eventually managed to arrange a meeting, even though Jane was grumbling that they had just met a week ago and she thought everything was clear. That’s why Alex decided to start the conversation.

• Alex: “Jane, last week we successfully released the new version of the PaperGone web app, finally resolving the late payment bug and its consequences. We’ve also started implementing the branding update in our mobile app, which was previously delayed but marked as the number one priority. This task will take us through this week and the next.”
• Jane: “Stop, stop, stop,” Jane interrupted. “Why is this rebranding still in our plans? I thought we had already postponed it - I told the team to push it back. We need to focus on adapting to our partner's ECO Hub API changes coming up in two months. Without this fix, we won’t be able to process paper recycling orders, and we’ll be buried under complaints from customers. Business is fine, but this is a tough market. We must maintain customer loyalty to survive. I thought this task was already reprioritized. Please make it your first priority, it’s critical right now.
• Alex: “Got it, Jane. And by the way, I’ve heard Christine from the dev team is looking for a new job. She’s frustrated by the constantly shifting priorities, and I’m concerned since she’s the one who has to implement this API. I fear that this change in plans could push her to leave.”

The next 20 minutes were spent discussing the company’s situation, clarifying the backlog for the next six months, and addressing Christine’s situation. There wasn’t time for small talk about Alex, but that’s normal for a first 121. Here are the key insights Alex took away from the meeting:

1. We could have failed again: We were planning based on outdated information. The business priorities had shifted, and this meeting helped correct that before it became a bigger problem. Later, we’ll need to discuss with Jane how to keep the backlog updated to avoid these situations in the future, but for now, we’ll focus on the API changes.
2. I know the importance of the API changes: I can now explain to the team why this task is critical if anyone questions the shift in priorities.
3. We addressed Christine’s potential departure: We came up with a plan to retain Christine and keep her motivated at PaperGone. I’ll follow up with HR to put this plan into action. And everyone have information about potential risks on the project. And now, everyone is informed about the potential risks her departure could pose to the project.

Now, it’s time to handle the team.

Empowering Your Team: The Impact of Regular 121s

The second primary goal of 121s is to stay informed about what's happening within your team and communicate your expectations to your team members.

The rules for an effective 121 system are similar to those applied with your boss, as discussed in the previous section. However, in this case, you are the boss, so there are additional recommendations:

1. Keep meetings to 30 minutes: This is the perfect length to discuss everything without wasting time.

2. Meetings should be regular:

   1. For key team members, it’s best to hold them weekly.
   2. Avoid postponing or rescheduling meetings. You and your team member should respect each other. Rescheduling should only happen if something critical for the business occurs (e.g., an urgent client meeting).

3. Schedule via calendar and have a consistent link (if using a video conferencing tool): This helps create a habit.

4. Avoid scheduling all 121s on the same day: If you have many team members, it’s better to space them out to maintain focus and connection with each individual. One 121 per day is ideal.

5. Don’t plan 121s on days when the team member has a tight schedule: For instance, if they have many meetings, it’s better to push your meeting to the next day to ensure you’re both mentally prepared.

6. Avoid Monday morning meetings: In general, just don’t. Especially for team members who manage others. Give them time to gather information.

7. Take notes: It doesn’t have to be a recording, but having meeting minutes is crucial for long-term project analysis. You can use a Notes app, a document, or even good old-fashioned pen and paper - whatever works best for you.

Implementing this framework requires you to announce it as part of the management structure. Everyone should know there is now a status system in place. As an additional tip, if your company has grown to the point where you have job instructions and process documentation, it’s a good idea to create a 121 meeting policy. Sometimes it’s easier to implement new rituals if they’re written down. A documented policy also works better with new employees and helps cement the practice into your company culture.

A typical 121 agenda could include:

1. If your team member manages others:

   • How is everyone in their team doing?

   • What were the results from last week?

   • What are the plans for next week?

   • How is their motivation? Any personal updates

     
     

Listen carefully and make notes. Encourage your team member to hold similar meetings with their own teams, creating a streamlined reporting system that fosters transparency.

2. Ask your team member similar questions about their own work:

   • Do they have any problems?

   • Do they see any issues in other teams?

   • Do they have ideas for improving processes?

   • How are things going overall?

     
     

This last question requires genuine curiosity. It’s more than small talk at the start of a meeting. Over time, these conversations can reveal valuable insights about the company.

3. Discuss the current situation in the company:

   Share updates on where the company is headed, why certain features are being implemented, and any challenges. Transparency here helps prevent rumours, which can be far more harmful than the truth.

The Long-Term Gains of Regular 121s

Alex understood these principles and began implementing them. It would be nice to say that the team welcomed this with open arms, but the reality was quite different:

• Some team members felt that Alex, like a typical manager, was just introducing unnecessary meetings - a way to avoid doing real work.
• The server team lead missed the meeting several times, getting so immersed in coding that he forgot to even check the calendar.
• The mobile team lead joined from noisy cafes, making it difficult to have a productive conversation.
• The product team was often on important calls, making it hard to find the perfect time for the 121 meetings.

However, the regularity of the meetings helped. The team eventually adapted to the new routine, and soon everyone saw the benefits.

For instance:

• During a session with the QA team lead, they discovered a shortage of devices for testing and a lack of testing environments. These issues were quickly addressed, and later, through ongoing 121 meetings, they identified the need for a larger automation project to streamline the process.
• Sessions with the mobile team revealed a significant amount of technical debt that had been neglected for a long time due to the focus on business features. These meetings helped address the debt and make critical improvements before the infrastructure could collapse.
• The situation with Christine, the developer who was considering leaving due to unclear backlogs and shifting priorities, was resolved. The regular 121s became a consistent source of updates and alignment.

As a result, the overall number of meetings in the team was reduced. Everyone now had a clear task tracker, daily standups for routine matters, and dedicated time to discuss anything important on 121s.

After a few months, the team had a fixed list of things to improve. Some of them were already in motion, while others required additional management techniques. But the foundation of talking - regular, structured conversations - allowed Alex to address most issues with minimal resources, demonstrating the true power of 121s.

In the end, the company overcame its quality issues and continued to expand in the market. Alex attended a few conferences, sharing steps on improving the development process, and eventually received an offer from another company with a better salary. PaperGone would have to find a new engineering manager and, once again, adapt to the new vision of whoever came next. It wasn’t the first time, and, unfortunately, it wouldn’t be the last. Alas.