Two seasons of Nine Perfect Strangers have already hit our screens, drawing viewers back into its mesmerizing world of wellness retreats, healing journeys, and psychological transformation. Yet beneath the glossy visuals and neatly resolved storylines lies a more troubling truth: the show reflects a dangerous misunderstanding of what genuine transformation—whether personal, professional, digital, or cultural—actually demands.
As someone who guides founders and leadership teams through intentional transformation, I watched the series with fascination, but also with a deep concern. While Nine Perfect Strangers captures the desire for radical change, it glamorizes shortcuts that, in the real world, can leave people more broken than before. The show provides a cautionary tale — and a reminder of what leaders need to keep in mind when guiding themselves and their teams through real, sustainable growth.
Transformation Takes More Than a High
At the heart of Masha’s process is the classic arc of transformation: break them down to build them up. Except she skips two critical steps: preparation and integration.
In the world of psychedelic therapy, those two stages are non-negotiable. But they are equally crucial in leadership. Whether you're rolling out a digital transformation, pivoting your business model, or reshaping your company culture, insight alone isn’t enough. Without proper prep, people get overwhelmed. Without integration, any changes revert quickly, often with guilt and shame for “failing” to stay transformed.
Together with my fellows, we build programs around those missing stages. The in-person kickoff is just the beginning. The magic is in the continuity — the intentional rhythm of microshifts, integration touchpoints, and collective reflection. Transformation doesn’t happen in 10 days. It happens when you make space for your team to evolve gradually, with guidance and support.
Trust Is Essential — But So Is Autonomy
One of the most alarming dynamics in Nine Perfect Strangers is the guru complex. Masha repeatedly tells participants to “just trust me.” Her team describes her as superhuman. This isn’t empowerment — it’s indoctrination.
As leaders, we cannot take away people’s power in the name of helping them grow. Real leadership means holding space, not holding control. At Mindkicker, we don’t have all the answers. We help participants unearth their own. We guide teams to uncover what’s already inside, rather than layering on external frameworks that don’t stick.
Trust should never be a substitute for understanding. When your team asks why, that’s not resistance — it’s a signal that they’re engaged. Welcome it.
Digital Detox, Done Right
Like Masha, we ask our participants to leave their phones behind at our kick-off. But we don’t just confiscate them. We prepare them — mentally and logistically. And we don’t abandon the idea once they return to work. Our year-long program includes reminders and nudges to help them re-experience the power of disconnection.
It’s not about forcing people to unplug. It’s about helping them choose it — and feel the benefit of it — again and again.
We Don't "Fix" People
One of the show’s most dangerous messages is the promise: “We’re going to get you well.” As if wellness is something done to you.
In real transformation work, no one gets "healed" by someone else. The role of a guide or coach is not to fix, but to mirror. For example, we don’t take away our participants' meds or replace their doctors. But we’ve had participants rediscover their strength in such profound ways that, with their doctors' support, they’ve chosen to step away from decades of medication — on their own terms.
From Strangers to Team
Tony says on Day 2: “This is definitely not a team. This is like the opposite of a team.” And yet, by the end, these nine strangers have formed deep bonds. That’s the power of shared vulnerability, guided reflection, and a well-designed group process.
What leadership team wouldn’t want to experience that?
The Cheerful Mask & The Invisible Pain
Every workplace has a Napoleon — someone endlessly upbeat, often to the point of irritation. But as the series shows, those who seem the strongest often carry the heaviest load. Leaders, don’t assume someone is okay just because they’re cheerful. Keep checking in. The cracks often appear too late.
Leaders Must Do Their Work — But Not Through Their Teams
Lastly, a personal warning. Masha tries to heal her trauma through her participants. It’s an ethical red flag — and a risk every leader faces. When you’re burned out or grieving, it's tempting to pour yourself into helping others. But that’s not healing — that’s projection. And it’s dangerous.
Leaders must do their own work, away from their teams. Because when we confuse our role as facilitators with our own healing journey, we stop being guides and start building cults.
Real Transformation Is Possible
Despite its flaws, Nine Perfect Strangers gets one thing right: transformation is possible, even for the most unlikely group of people. But in the real world, it takes more than a retreat and a promise. It takes structure, support, and safety. That’s what Mindkicker is built to offer — and that’s what every team deserves.