GM crypto cheetahs. You’re reading Owlsome— A place where readers bang their chest like a gorilla with happiness. The content below can be funnier than a cat getting arrested for a serious crime. Note: Here’s what we’re covering today. Coinbase’s Base is chasing pace. Elon’s X crypto integration vision lands in hot water Twitter CoinBase has unofficially sliced SEC’s lawsuit into two parts The mother of Elon’s Children made more money through NFTs than from her entire music career. Funniest meme on the planet Coinbases's Base looks ready to win the race! Base, a Layer 2 developed by Coinbase using the Optimism developer stack went live for the public, a few weeks back. And Boi, its instant success has left haters with the same reaction on their faces as when you fart up a storm and then feel liquid. Base Highlights The base was first launched in July but for only developers On AUG 9, it got open for everyone and therefore witnessed a huge uptick in users. Taking the user no. to an all-time high of 100,983. Base has successfully impregnated fear in the hearts of its competitors with over $160 m of Ethereum and other cryptos moved to the chain hours after launch. Plus it hosts an ecosystem of over 100 (decentralized applications) DApps and service providers. The L2 rollup has already glided past competitors like Starknet and Immutable X— Ranking 4th in daily transactions among the colony of L2s. Unfortunately, the L2 will never have its own token. How does Base, complement Coinbase? Well, Base sparkles the ass of Coinbase in mainly 3 ways, let’s discuss them. 1️⃣It enables a better user experience, through its low and faster transaction fees 2️⃣Base Rollup network also enhances the scalability and efficiency of Coinbase 3️⃣Base empowers Coinbase to process a significantly high volume of transactions off Ethereum, eliminating any network congestion and slowdown issues. 4️⃣Overall Base is like Harry Potter’s magic stick for Coinbase. Base is definitely a centralized Blockchain, and its growth, should not be celebrated the way I’m doing. But who cares…after all things never happen according to us. So sit back and sip Cola. Web3 wallet Suku may beat Crypto Twitter payment adoption Suku, a web3 wallet application, has the power to tear apart Twitter's dream of becoming a payment platform. How? While Mr. Musk kept dreaming and ranting about making Twitter a platform for crypto payments, the guys at SUKU were working towards doing just that. If only Elon didn’t spend months on that new X logo, we’d already have a payment platform within X. Twitter However, let’s look at the highlights of the SUKU wallet. Allows peeps to transfer crypto and NFTs using their Twitter handles Supports social media networks like Linkedin, FaceBook, Reddit, and Instagram. The best part is, It’s non-custodial Wow!! 3 Things that the CEO of SUKU Yonathan Lapchik, said I see as slaps on Elon’s Face. 1️⃣If you use Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Reddit, and LinkedIn all day, you don't want to have a payment system for each one – you only want to have one that connects to all social media platforms. 2️⃣ It isn’t easy to create a decentralized payments system with one centralized application, therefore Suku needs to expand to other platforms for users to maintain a holistic social graph. (think- ohhhhoooooo…meme) 3️⃣Elon’s plan to rebrand to X, is as stupid as a man trying to lick a monkey’s butt…(Oh…He said this in his mind). Talk about a thought whisperer. Like my writing style? Subscribe to to have the most entertaining crypto news and narratives right in your inbox. Owlsome Coinbase beat revenue amid SEC lawsuit Guess who’s the happiest bald man on the planet lately. With a head brighter than his future, Brian Arm Strong has pushed every limit to make Coinbase regulatory compliant in the U.S. However, the SEC wrapped around the neck of Coinbase like an Anaconda earlier in June, with its lawsuit. Everyone thought that the lawsuit will swallow the company. anaconda But it turns out SEC’s lawsuit is the best thing that happened to Coinbase. Coinbase shares are since up over 154% year to date. Investor confidence in the company is steadily growing. USDC(Firm’s stablecoin) had risen to $1.8 billion from $1.2 billion due CoinBase’s newly launched L2 is growing like a volcanic eruption. And the craziest news of all— Coinbase’s revenue beat analysts’ predictions. The company registered $708 M in revenue for the 2nd quarter of 2023, surpassing the predicted $628m by a wide margin. I bet the company's employees are raising a toast to the lawsuit. With their confidence levels reaching an all-time high. Talk about an opportunity in disguise. Above everything else, the company proudly says that it will win the fight against the SEC and will also force them to lay clearer regulations over time. Grimes’ NFT earnings Top her entire music career earnings Hold on to your headphones folks, Grimes, who is less popular as a singer and more popular as Elon’s GF, has rode the NFT wave in sheer style. The pretty lady made more than $5.8m in less than 20 minutes from NFTs in 2021. That’s more money she earned in her entire music career, according to her. All thanks to her brother, Mac Boucher, who gave her this fantastic idea ‘to come up with a 10 NFT collection called “WarNymph”’. Grimes, who mothered two children with Elon Musk, has been releasing music since 2010. She says, the foray into the NFT world has changed her life. Elon is an alien Grimes is now stepping into AI. And Guess what? She has launched an AI-voice software that enables anyone to create vocals using her voice. Plus she’d offered to split 50% of the royalties with the creator who made a song using her software. While I do not know how successful this idea might be, I’d like to think the Gal is quite intelligent. Needless to say, that’s probably why Elon dated her. Funniest Meme on the planet Bitcoin Whales be like… Also published . here

This piece was written for humor or satire and may include nonfactual statements, stories, or anecdotes.

Hot off the press! This story contains factual information about a recent event.

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