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Are you the Cryptocurrency Consigliere? by@dave-balter

Are you the Cryptocurrency Consigliere?

Dave Balter Hacker Noon profile picture

Dave Balter

CEO of Flipside Crypto

Help Wanted: seeking a mythical cryptocurrency creature

  • Wakes up every morning with the balls to dress like Vitalik Buterin at TechCrunch Disrupt.
  • Texts with Satoshi Nakamoto from a burner phone (usually about the weather.)
  • Knows the secret Somerville, MA phone line to the Poloniex people.
  • Invested in a cryptocurrency in 2003. Actually, created the term cryptocurrency in 1996. Hell, thought about cryptocurrency in 1964.
  • Memorized this cburniske valuation equation, and can recite it backwards.
  • Is a Miner. Like, for coal. Wears a hardhat with stickers and everything.
  • Snake-hisses at any mention of Jamie Dimon.
  • Sells Cointelegraph illustrations on the dark web.
  • Reincarnated from first life as a feline. Specifically, ex-Mt. Gox CEO’s cat, Tibane.
  • Developed a proprietary cold storage solution that is fully refrigerated.
  • Does Olaf’s hair. No mousse.

If you’re a fit, contact us by writing a smart contract into Ethereum

or tweet this.

I’m about to ICO a Token for Medium clapping. Clap below if you want to get in on the presale.